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Keeping up with the Kontentsphere

Friday 4th August 2017

Has another week passed you by with nary a fleeting glance at the weird and wonderful world of online content? Get the goss with another handy installment of Keeping up with the Kontentsphere.

 

LORDE VIDEO

Lorde put out a new music video for her song 'Perfect Places' and, as is the law, you will have no doubt already displayed a sprig of baby’s breath and a vial of your first-born's blood on your doorstep in reverence.

This time around Lorde takes her weird twitching on vacay, and appears in a variety of exotic locations drinking tea, wielding machetes (?) and ruining a bunch of fancy clothes in the sea. Oh to be young!

JACINDA

As you surely now know, CONSPICUOUSLY BABYLESS Labour MP Jacinda Ardern took the party’s helm this week when Andrew Little decided he no longer wished to continue his reign of mediocrity.

Will Jacinda be up to the task? Or will the media’s fixation on whether she will have a baby/whether we should talk about her having a baby/whether we should talk about whether we should talk about her having a baby form a thick swamp through which even the lithest political leader could not traverse? With only 5 weeks to the election, the (biological???) clock is ticking!

ART GREEN POO

Every morning on my walk to work, I pass a mysterious enterprise that opened up recently in one of the new retail spaces at the top of Crummer Road in Grey Lynn. Called ‘BePure’ it looks like an upscale boutique crossed with a particularly bougie medical clinic. For months now I have wondered what goes on within those strange, elite looking consultation rooms and, this week on Instagram, I found out:

It’s Art Green shitting in a box.

I guess some mysteries just aren’t meant to be solved.

ALEX JONES x SPEIDI

You’ll never guess who professional conspiracy theorist and noted psycho Alex Jones ‘ran into’ while on vacation in Hawaii - his old mates and former reality TV stars Heidi and Spencer Pratt!  

Appropriately titled ‘Alex Jones Crazy Interview with Heidi Montag & Spencer Pratt’ on Jones’s own YouTube channel, the interview includes the couple’s thoughts on a number of topics including Black Helicopters, Russia and their fear of being murdered. Same.

LOVE IS DEAD

Jay-Jay Feeney and Dom Harvey, beloved radio hosts and #couplegoals, announced on air, Facebook and The Edge’s website that they are breaking up.

If you’re thinking “weren’t they already broken up?”, well, so was I, but apparently that was the other long term commercial radio DJ golden couple Polly and Grant, who also broke up but stayed on the air together, just as Jay-Jay and Dom plan to do. Phew.



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