Auckland's favourite very tall tower is turning 20. To celebrate we remember the best and the brightest to hurl themselves off of it.
Yes that’s right, our country’s most beloved phallus, the Sky Tower, has turned the ripe old age of 20.
“20?” you say. “How time flies!”
That it does, dear reader, that it does and in the time since the Sky Tower was first built all those moons ago so much has happened. If that shaft could talk!
For whatever reason our beloved tower of the sky has long drawn the best and brightest stars from around the world. As the Sky Jump website proclaims: “so many interesting people have SkyJumped off the Sky Tower recently that’s it getting like Madame Tussauds around here, but a lot more exciting”.
And what do these waxy folk do once there? Why, they leap off it of course! To celebrate two decades of tower fun, here is a brief history the best celebrities to have plummeted through the Auckland sky.
2010 - DANE RUMBLE
In 2010, beloved musician Dane Rumble not only leapt from the tower but performed a free show (!) on that weird little platform that bungee participants land on. Though the actual audio for that show has been mysteriously replaced by a studio recording of Rumble’s music and the no-doubt excellent performance he gave has been lost in time forever, this very special moment will always live on in Sky Tower history - and our hearts.
2012 - ONE DIRECTION
In 2012, the celebrity presence at the Sky Tower started getting ~international~ when One Direction members Louis and Niall popped by to take the plunge. Just on the cusp of the stardom that would eventually tear them all apart, the boys arrived at the ground to sound of squealing girls with Louis declaring “now that was tight on my balls”. Falling from a tall building? Talk about going in One Direction! harharhar.
2013 - BEYONCE
It’s hard to imagine a megastar like Beyonce deigning to hurl herself off the southern hemisphere’s tallest structure, but in 2013 that’s exactly what happened. Somehow managing to look like a bloody goddess even when plummeting 192 metres to the ground, Beyonce will surely shed a tear with Blue, Rumi, and Sir today as she pays her respects to the tower from which she fell.
2015 - LAMB OF GOD
Lest you think it's all elderly women and pop stars leaping about the Auckland sky, in 2015 drummer Chris Adler of US heavy metal band Lamb of God stopped by to let the wind whistle through his woolly little beard as he fell through the air to the city streets below. While there is no video of this even, I think it is safe to say that Adler had a great time and will today be fondly reminiscing about this very metal moment.
2017 - HANSON
The jewel in the Sky Tower’s celebrity crown, however, was won just this year when none other than 90s boy band Hanson appeared on our shores and spent a characteristically sunny Auckland day leaping to their possible doom. Thankfully they survived to do-wop another day.
Who will be next? Obama? Bono? Rita Ora??? If these past 20 years are anything to go by, the possibilities are endless.